Follow Sean Inman to the best in craft beer
Going in, I am not big on candles. Rarely do they smell as advertised or if they do, it is a lot of smell. Enter Torched Beer Candles.
Now, will the three scents smell like grapefruit, vanilla or “wildberry”? Maybe. But will they smell like hefe, porter and Lambic. Betting not.
The vote is quickly in. Not needed.
Right off the bat, NO!
It is gaudy. You can’t tell the breweries very easily. And if you did, it is mostly the industrial lager boys.
Then, where would this go? Maybe a garage where one wouldn’t have to look at it. Maybe a dorm room if you want to declare how uncultured you are.
Summer is prime time for this feature of the blog. Every week seems to bring some wacky new beer idea. Heineken is next with their B.O.T.
The Beer Outdoor Transporter. Obviously the B.O.T. was thought of first. Basically a tiny cooler on wheels that follows you to your party like the Mars Rover.
Now there are plain, old, boring coolers that you have to lift with your actual arms and there are wheeled versions that you have to drag or push but who wants to work.
Verdict – Not Needed. It’s 2021, I want a combination jet pack and cooler.
I can just picture this pitch meeting. Some marketing and swag VP cracks a joke about shoes being the first iteration of can coozy. A higher up laughs and then barks for a lackey to call his counterpart over at New Balance and thus….
A) It looks like something you would put on a horse for a Disney kids movie
B) I know Lite MUST be drunk cold so that you can freeze your taste buds but do I want the aroma of shoe leather?
Verdict – So not needed
Except for March Madness time of year, I don’t know what is on TruTV…
…but that might change with Backyard Bar Wars which will hit screens in July of this year. Hosted by Chris Distefano the show pits two backyards vs each other to see which has the best home bar. I assume the usual invisible handymen will do the constructing.
Is it Needed or Not – Well that depends on the comedian host. If Distefano is fun and not in the way, then this could be escapist fun with the occasional good idea for our own bars (outside or in). I don’t expect to see taps of craft beer but maybe a LA local might appear. So, the verdict is smack dab in the Needed.
This luxury item from Kona Brewing has been on offer since December of last year and though the price is 2k, I would say that it is one of the better swag ideas that I have seen. It is a natural fit with beer, especially Kona beers.
It doesn’t land in the Not column and is not really needed but is at least useful and fun.
Maybe I am not active enough. Why am I not multi-tasking? No place would be off limits to the latest hazy IPA if I had the Toadfish Non-Tipping Can Cooler. Labeled as the “un-spillable beverage cooler” it uses that modern suction cup technology to stick a can anywhere there is a smooth surface. Oh and it will keep that beer cold too.
Now in the video it is mostly water based activities. So salt water is getting into your Gose while you surf or boat and at one point the koozie is on the roof of a car. Gotta think the police would love that idea.
Needed? Not. You can wait until you reach a non-rocking place to have your Bourbon Barrel Aged pastry stout or you can hold the can until you are finished. What percentage of beer is actually being lost to slippery surfaces? Gotta be a real niche inside a Russian Nesting Doll of niches.
So, it doesn’t take an eagle eye to notice that this occasional feature is a thinly veiled mostly “not” post. But, in the interest of fairness, I thought I would add something that I would like to see…
…yup, that is beer in a box. And it is obviously not a scalable venture. You can read more HERE and HERE but I like this idea as a fun way to show off beer at a house party or to encourage sharing. Especially when it comes to wild and spontaneous beers.
So kudos to Primitive Beer. This is the first Needed of Needed or Not?