Tag: Needed or Not?

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Needed or Not Day – Kettle Bellz

There are many things in this world that I do not understand. Particle physics. Rocket Surgery. Why my wife loves me still. But even more inexplicable is that Buzz Ballz is a thing and that as a marketing stunt they have made Kettle Bellz. A piece of exercise equipment that is also a grape cocktail. Why grape? Probably because they have done blue raspberry and birthday cake already. I just pulled those two things out my head but they seem like something a company ballz in the name would do.

Not Needed to the Nth degree.

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Needed or Not Day – Stout Gravy

Maybe this tasted really good.  I mean gravy is hard to screw up, not that folks haven’t succeeded and Guinness would key in nicely here but I am not looking for boozy mashed potatoes or a beer-y sauce for my steak.

It is close this time, but Not Needed especially if it comes in what looks like a beer can.

And don’t fret, there is also a chicken version.

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Needed or Not? – PBR Soup

Sometimes a movie or a coffee drink tries to capitalize on a trend but just comes out way too late to take any advantage of that zeitgeisty moment.

Case in point, soup (?) from Chunky that claims to have the flavor of Pabst in it…

…. both of these are trying way too hard. Not just chili, but chili with bacon. Not just cheese soup but toss in chorizo too. And both of these cans have such strong flavors that I dare anyone to find that light and bland taste of Pabst in there.

So Not Needed. Get some Guinness and add it to your chili instead and then do a dark Mexican lager addition to your cheese soup.

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Needed or Not? – Lego Beer

I do not have the patience to put together a Lego Millennium Falcon let alone something tiny, but I would give this Lego Krug a try…

…though 189 pieces is daunting to me. I also like that it is for 18 years and up. As if someone younger would start drinking after putting this together.

Very Needed! See, I do like some beer toys.

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Needed or Not? – PBR Cheese

I know that I am in the minority when it comes to my disdain of the Pabst Blue Ribbon.  Just because it always tastes the same is not the badge of honor some think it is and I certainly do not approve of their new cheese with Yancey’s Fancy, a New York-based cheesemaker to create a Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer Flavored Cheese.

Pabst did have a short cheese-making stint during Prohibition but that should stay in the history books.

Not Needed.

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Needed or Not? – Upside Down Glass

If we had not reached and surpassed peak crazy glassware, this certainly puts it over the top…

…fully upside down glassware that makes drinking a real chore because the base of a glass was not built for drinking from in any type of dignified manner.

As I have brought up a few times now, innovation is great, love it. But just being quirky without adding a benefit is not helping at this point.

Not Needed! – Maybe it was pre-craft beer when everything was in a iced shaker pint in the U.S. and specialty beer glassware was only in Europe but not now. We all good now.

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Needed or Not? – Anchovy Vermouth

I will admit up front that I had to look at the bottle a few times before I could accept that this fish based Vermouth wasn’t really, yet another, weird ass vodka.

And of course, it sold out. The spirit was made with “Cantabrian Anchovies from Spain. Those were infused (alongside some carefully chosen botanicals) into this vermouth for one of the most unique flavor profiles you’ve probably ever tasted.”

Needed ? – I do like a solid and authentic oyster stout but tinned fish is not my thing and briny vs botanical does not sound like a battle that could be won.

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Needed or Not? – YuleLager

Looks like 2024 is when yule logs jumped the shark thanks to the  limited-edition Miller Lite YuleLager, described as “a digital, beer-pouring fireplace that offers fans a festive new way to savor the sights, sounds, and great tasting sips of the holiday season.”

With such “amazing” features like….

  • “A custom BeerBlaze LED screen, which creates the illusion of a frothy, beer-filled fire;
  • A custom audio track so fans can enjoy the sounds of the crackling, faux fire paired with the satisfying pop of a freshly opened Miller Lite;
  • Extra beer storage designed to keep Miller Lite at the perfect temperature;
  • Sturdy, built-in stocking hooks;
  • An insulated, fully removable chimney-inspired beer tower that allows fans to pour ice-cold Miller Lite straight from the beautifully crafted wooden base of the YuleLager, turning holiday time into Miller Time.

Not Needed – just buy good Christmas beers and get YouTube to play a crackling fire for you and yours.

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Needed or Not – Beer Washed Jeans

I do not know about you but beer on / in my jeans is a bug and not a feature but apparently conservative Republicans think that Each Beer Wash Jeans “outfitted with a unique tag that features a Coors Banquet bottle opener and a patch kit for fans to customize their jeans” is cool.

I will be taking a pass, if I was going to have beer jeans, I would prefer to choose the beer I want scraping my skin myself.

Not Needed – but keep those wacky ideas coming your crazy marketing kids.

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Needed or Not – BarSys

Yes, the above does look like a Star Trek cocktail replicator down to the interior mood lighting. It also looks like a Dyson bladeless fan which could lead to trouble.

But it is the BarSys system. Kind of a boring name for basically a cocktail database plus pouring system plus light show. You pour your alcohol in the top as well as mixers on the other side, set your glass in the center and voila, time for a cocktail.

And yeah, it is cool that you can program your recipes plus others and it does look all future-y but part of the pouring a drink process for me is how it is calming and anticipatory to craft a drink. This robs you of that simple pleasure while also making you have to remember when you last cleaned the bourbon section of the device or if there is enough tonic.

Not Needed – make your simple favorites yourself and go to a fancy bar to have fancier cocktails made, that is so much simpler and fun.