Holiday Needed or Not? – Shyft

I saw this quote about a weird as hell brand offshoot from Modelo called Shyft, and I could feel the anger rising.  “a first-of-its-kind, patented, flavor-shifting” flavored malt beverage that’s “designed to hit different taste buds at different times.”

First, the idiot who decided that vowels were replaceable need to have all the vowels removed from their name permanently.  It is well past annoying at this point.

Second, the focus group that gave the thumbs up to Shyft as a name should also have all vowels removed from their names permanently.  This is why America can’t have good things.

Rant complete.

Why Modelo isn’t spending their money on say paying employees more or plant upgrades or more Damian Lillard commercials is beyond me.  But the sugar-ification of America must march forward until everything we eat is either sugar, salt or Pepper X.

Leave the flavor changing to candy and keep it out of beverages.  Not needed.

A Podcast & A Beer – The Wedding Scammer

If you want to get my wife’s podcast attention, there are two topics that will succeed. One is cults. Second is scams. And the Ringer Podcast Network has one of the latter, The Wedding Scammer. A seven part series hosted by Justin Sayles about a character that you just can’t make up. And a shit ton of aliases.

And what is good about this series is that Sayles is in on the whole true crime podcast tropes. You get a peek behind the curtain and see how it came together while you also get the story. You will rip through this in no time, it is that engrossing.

I would look for beers from all of the cities and states that the villain of the piece has moved through. Los Angeles, Oakland, Houston, New York and rural Pennsylvania too. Have a different style for each of the different names used.

In the Tap Lines for December 2023

It is the end of the road for 2023. 31 more days until 2024 starts smacking us around. It has been a doozy. Strikes. Indictments. Wars. Inflation. And we are probably gonna run it back again. But, before you say we are doomed, we still have great craft beer and Christmas beers!

~ e-visits to (3) breweries from Craft Beer & Brewing’s Best of 2023

~ special featured reviews of beers if I find room amongst the seasonal beers.

~Heads-Up on Los Angeles Beer Events

~ Three suggested beers to buy this month. One light, one medium and one dark

~ A Book & A Beer reads Going Infinite by Michael Lewis

~ A Podcast & A Beer listens to NPR’s Book of the Day

~ Sports & A Beer returns with Where are all the Good QB’s?

~ New Beer Releases and Best Beers of the Month

~ I will tap the Firkin and give my no holds barred opinion on the craft beer world.

The Firkin for November 2023

There has been a wee bit of gnashing of teeth as noteworthy breweries have changed hands. Ecliptic into the Ninkasi portfolio. Many breweries huddled newly under the Tilray banner. Anchor in a weird limbo.

Beer fans can ponder the economics of it all but I would say that we also need to learn how to let go. There was a run on Anchor beers only when supplies became limited. The only other notable press they received was for their design change that no one liked.

My question becomes, if Anchor or Ecliptic or pick a brewery in trouble were to be lifted magically to in the black and not red, would that amount of beer be sold? I doubt it.

As SoCal belatedly settles into fall, we should all understand that seasons change. Your favorite brewery, my favorite beer, that great taproom you traveled to will most likely all be gone and that is OK. Not great. A bummer for sure but it opens the door for a new wave to try their hands at this crazy brewing game.

Doctor Who & A Beer

Doctor Who is back! So is David Tennant. Not as the 10th Doctor but the 14th.

And I have just the beer for watching the three specials and then the Christmas Day appearance of the 15th Doctor, Space Time Sipper DDH IPA a collaboration between Tarantula Hill and Casa Agria.

“With an extraordinary hop lineup including Mosaic, Citra, Cryo 586, Simcoe, and Riwaka, this brew is crafted for the ultimate cosmic experience. It’s like sipping on a starlit dream, with the first dry hop showcasing Cryo 586, Citra, and Riwaka, and the second stage burn featuring an intergalactic blend of Nectaron, Simcoe, and Mosaic.”

For a deeper cut, Urban Roots has a barrel-aged beer by the name of Demon’s Run that has brandy barrels in its pedigree. An only viewers and River Song know where the brandy is hidden on the Tardis.

Need another L.A. suggestion? Benny Boy Brewing has a new bourbon barrel-aged Cherry cider coming December 10th, named Madame Ruby. And the new Doctor’s companion is named, Ruby Sunday.

Sports & A Beer – Trade Demands

As a lifelong Trailblazer fan, this summer of trades has been bittersweet.  Not seeing Damian Lillard in the red and black is weird.  But what is weirder are the trade demands being made.

I love Lillard but telling Portland that he wanted ONLY to go to Miami felt a little hostage-y.  And I wasn’t the only one to think so as the NBA head office fined him and his agent over it.  But Lillard was an absolute angel in comparison to James Harden who is toxic enough that the 76ers didn’t even want him on a team flight and had security bar him from the plane before pawning him to his third team in three years, the Clippers.

I am way more pro player than pro ownership but a player can’t point and expect to go.  Unless.  The preferred team is willing to actually negotiate in good faith.  Now that we have both had a good laugh, here is what should be done by the player.  Let the team you want to leave know that you have a preferred destination but also give them other less liked but OK landing spots.  My guess is that the reception will be a lot better when not demanding with a capital D.  And the fact that there is a list will incentivize team 1 to deal since other teams are in the running.

Trades can be good or bad.  Try to make them better people.

For beer, I would suggest a fun game.  Bring three separate beers from your ‘fridge and see what you can trade for from a beer loving friends stash.  You can even ask for a beer to be named later.  See who ends up with what and who thinks they won.  See if being super extra demanding works to your benefit.

A Podcast & A Beer – Patented

Most of my podcast recommendations are of new or ongoing series.  Patented is the first one where I found it just as it was wrapping up its run.  Part of the History Hit family of historical podcast, this one was ostensibly about inventions but it was really more about pivotal items or thoughts.

You could get a history of fish & chips and then a show about the patriarchy then one about the thermos.  Wide ranging stuff for sure.  Hosted by Dallas Campbell the show had fascinating tidbits of knowledge though at times the pacing could have sped up.

I would say that you just glance at each topic and see which ones grab you that day and see what you learn.

For beer, I would look for, if you are in Los Angeles, beers from Trademark Brewing in Long Beach since it is the closest to a patent that I could find. For those not near enough, I would look for historical styles and then learn about the twists and turns for that style, or find a flagship beer from a local brewery and learn how that beer, that recipe, came to be.

Needed or Not? – Beer n Brats chips

Limited time potato chip varietals will never stop.  I like to imagine that there are tubes filled with ten spices and to make a new flavor, in this case, Lays Chip Researchers just re-mixe the spices in different amounts and orders to come up with one that resembles Beer flavor and sausage flavor.  

But why? Are they really selling enough of these to justify the new packaging and clip art? I have the same reaction to Chicken and waffles chips too.

NOT needed. Just get a beer, then sausage then add in chips on the side. Or at least Lays should stick to just Brat flavored.

A Book & A Beer – The Vaster Wilds by Lauren Groff

Vaster Wilds is in a word, harrowing. Author Lauren Groff has written a colonial era adventure that will leave you knowing for sure that we are really soft here in 2023.

We follow Lamentation Callat or as she is mostly called Zed or just a servant girl following her escape from a settlement that has fallen apart due to hunger and unpreparedness for this new world.

The narrative is her journey away from that horror interspersed with the journey from orphanage during a plague to America which is better but not great. Her mistress calls her the same name as a beloved former dog.

Hunting for food. Dodging men. Trying to stay warm. Staying alive in the wild. Each page makes you want her to find a nice warm abandoned cabin filled with food and clean clothes. But this wisp of a girl is strong.

I will avoid further description to stay clear of spoilers but this is a churn your stomach read that would have been good for Halloween. The last seventy pages flew by with great speed.

To drink, I would go rustic. Rustic pilsners seem to be a growing trend. Or a rustic saison. If neither are on shelves look for something unfiltered to approximate the types of water found in the forest and streams. A third choice would be something from the Bear Republic Brewing portfolio for reasons I cannot divulge.