The Firkin for February 2024

I usually do not venture into the comments in social media because my opinion of humanity is already low enough as it is but when I saw noted home brewing authority Denny Conn posted this in the middle of this month….

….I delved into what people had to say and boy was it an eye opening. There is a lot of bruised feelings and ill will to how the Brewers Association (BA) is handling the American Homebrewers Association (AHA) and not just from rank and file homebrewers but from influential beer people whom I know from their writing and speaking. There is also a lot of low opinions of the marquee festival as well.

It is dispiriting to say the least because the BA and AHA really need each other in the way that a Major League Baseball team needs the minor leagues. And GABF needs to get its mojo back as well.

But despite the low ebb, the tide can turn. I would strongly suggest that the AHA be given autonomy on how it runs events so that the leadership of that group can brainstorm how to make HomeBrewCon and other gatherings more attractive to members. Folding a sliver of the event into GABF seems a small gesture at best. Perhaps smaller regional events are the way to go. But the AHA members should be charting the way not dictated at by Denver.

As for GABF, I have been twice (ages ago) and, yes, it is not for the faint of crowds or cup drop culture. But it is also a fantastic way to sample beers that you otherwise would have to take a year off of work and travel the country to taste. Again, maybe regional events would be a solution with a smaller, focused affair in Denver for those that win judging regionally. Sort of a March Madness model.

First off, there needs to be some fence mending and that means people getting together to talk about craft beer and how pros and amateurs can work in concert.

The Firkin for January 2024

Seems like IP un-aithorization has roared back into use again. For a while, labels that I saw on the interwebs seemed to have actual thought out designs but lately, that whole piggyback on someone else’s work is back like a cold you can’t shake.

I know that punners gonna pun and that not all artistry will be to my particular liking. There are some breweries whose labels just do not speak to me but I am at the very least, on board with breweries who at least try to be original.

But there are soooo many lazy beer labels that look like children’s cereal boxes or sodas or candy bars that I have to believe that they sell enough to make a brewery take that step into outright identity theft. Me, I would looking over my shoulder for a Cease and Desist letter.

This, at a time, when you can probably find many artists to create a look for your new pastry stout or candy sour that actually tells the story of your brand and not a secondhand tale with missing pages that is more attached to the original IP than your beer.

The Firkin for December 2023

One last kvetch for 2023 before the craft beer world moves into 2024.

Hours of Operation. Why do I have to be Sherlock Holmes or an investigative journalist to find them and once found, why am I wary that they don’t really reflect the actual open hours?

A little backtrack first. My father was an inveterate gambler when it came to going out to a restaurant. He barely checked the address, let alone if the darn place would be open. God forbid he call the establishment.

My genome carried some of that devil may care attitude but it has been slowly and surely burned out of me. In my last road trip, I read and re-read the hours of one spot that I wanted to visit. It seemed clear but it was clearly at odds with the sign on the closed door that said different.

Another brewery that I checked and re-checked was closed for a staff event. No where was that mentioned. Guess it was expected that people would find out when they drove their and saw a darkened taproom. Another brewery was lit up and an employee was inside but that employee was apparently the only one who showed up and so the brewery was staying locked.

If I had called the brewery with the staff event, would the message said that? If I had called the one employee brewery, would the phone have been answered. I suspect no in both instances.

Why can’t hours be easy and clear? Are they changing with such frequency that social media cannot be updated quickly enough? Does no one have that job?

The fix is simple. Check your hours on your website and social media pages. Then fix if needed. If hours for a certain week, like Christmas or New Year’s is different, then post that.

Of the three places where I traveled and met with no welcome, I did not go back to two of them. That should say something.

The Firkin for November 2023

There has been a wee bit of gnashing of teeth as noteworthy breweries have changed hands. Ecliptic into the Ninkasi portfolio. Many breweries huddled newly under the Tilray banner. Anchor in a weird limbo.

Beer fans can ponder the economics of it all but I would say that we also need to learn how to let go. There was a run on Anchor beers only when supplies became limited. The only other notable press they received was for their design change that no one liked.

My question becomes, if Anchor or Ecliptic or pick a brewery in trouble were to be lifted magically to in the black and not red, would that amount of beer be sold? I doubt it.

As SoCal belatedly settles into fall, we should all understand that seasons change. Your favorite brewery, my favorite beer, that great taproom you traveled to will most likely all be gone and that is OK. Not great. A bummer for sure but it opens the door for a new wave to try their hands at this crazy brewing game.

The Firkin for October 2023

America has a sweet tooth. And boy, howdy, it is a big one. That craving for sugar is well ensconced in craft beer just like the rest of the U.S. foodways.

Yes, I am calling for at least a moratorium on the hyper sweetened beers. As I have said before and will say again, creativity and boundary pushing is fantastic but we have reached the boundary and it is time to proceed in a new direction.

I am hoping that a new path is already being charted by intrepid brewers and breweries and it will only be a matter of time before that path becomes a clear trend.

But in the meantime, let’s pause it with pancake stouts, stop the sugary seltzers, cancel cacao coffee and eliminate excess eclair beers. We get it. Or at least I do. I want to see what else you can brew.

The Firkin for September 2023

I do not remember which brewery finally put me over the top but this month, I am officially done with photos and videos of spilled beer.

First is was the glamour shots of beer caught in freeze frame like a reverse waterfall flying up out of a glass, then it was the varied and sundry contests where beer ended up on the floor and lately it has been brewery staff drinking from a can but ending up with more on them and their clothes.

Maybe it is a sign of approaching geezerhood but as craft beer prices rise, wasting beer for a few digital thumbs up seems wrong. As a viewer, I wonder how many takes were needed for these videos. And as someone in a drought zone, I am heavily conscious of the amount of water it takes to brew beer and then add in the water needed to clean up after each Tik Tok stunt.

Then I break out my list of things breweries should do before uploading these videos like have an up to date tap list available, have your opening hours consistent on all platforms, keeping your website updated. Ya’ know, the basics.

I know that stuff is boring admin and doing video shoots is more fun and doesn’t seem so much like work but this beer fan is going to scroll right by spilt beer because that shit is sticky.

The Firkin for August 2023

Of the many broken and outdated practices in America is tipping. And it drops into the news whenever the economy stalls or the Republican Party tries to screw over the little people.

I run into it when I run in and out to get a 4-pack and am pressed into tipping since most transactions are now by chipcard or phone. Smartly, the POS system makes it harder or very noticeable when no tip is picked. And it is increasingly harder to find 15% as even an option.

But there will be a major breaking point, at some point, much like the hidden fees with Airline tickets. Enough of a groundswell will make a hard reset necessary.

There are proponents for eliminating tips altogether. I lean towards that camp. I can hear howls of protest as I type this about how people will buy less while employers will have to pay more. I think that is overblown, unless there are some facts to disprove me, because most people, including myself now factor in tips and are already buying less accordingly.

I am a single can buyer and there have been countless times where I have put a can back because of the tip. But if each beer was 50 cents more, I probably would buy that can.

Add in that I don’t know if that money is going to just the person who helped me or put into a pool and I am less inclined to pick a higher tip.

Maybe, beer stores and breweries should see me coming and just tally up a higher price and get rid of the fees.

The Firkin for July 2023

I mentioned in a post earlier this month that I went to a brewery that was open per their website, per Facebook and per the sign on the window but when I opened the door to Gorges Beer Co. in Cascade Lock, it was indeed locked.

An employee hastily brought out a sign saying closed for the day and quickly explained that an employee had chosen to spend another day in Las Vegas. Either a streak at roulette was underway or they were trying to win back losses.

Now I get it. Keeping staff is hard while trying to keep costs in line but Gorges is a large space and for the life of me, I can’t see how one missing employee was the make it or break it piece.

Was the brewery closed the other days this person was in Sin City too? I joke that I can make or break a brewery or joke even further that they should know who I am but any traveler beer or otherwise would be let down by a shut taproom.

You need to find a way to open for to-go only or open just for a small amount of guests for limited hours because the show must go on.

The Firkin for June 2023

The 16oz can is the de rigeur format and has been for a few years now taking the packaging crown from the 22oz bomber and the six-pack with it’s 12 ounces. Though the 19.2oz stovepipe can is pushing for the throne currently.

This article in Punch talks briefly about why it is as well as the good and bad about it..

…but I firmly believe (and have expressed on this blog many times) that more sizes should be in the packaging arsenal.  I would like to see more big ABV beers in 10 ounce bottles or heck, 12 ounce cans.  I love the extra large format of some Belgian beers with the corks and one of these days, I will buy one of those jereboams that you sometimes see.

The packaging format should be as creative and unrestricted as the crazy beers that are inside them.

The Firkin for April 2023

At first, I thought that I should probably not comment on the whole Bud Light controversy. Primarily because it is just so emblematic of America to get offended so easily by showing the colors of the rainbow. A bit too “been there, done that”.

But I do have my two-cents to add, because beer, especially craft beer, should be more about community. And that is coming from an introvert who prefers to drink his beer in peace.

And all people should be allowed to drink their beer in peace. I am not going to tell someone with a can of Bud Light that they have horrible taste. I think they probably already know it. If asked, I will suggest better options. Something local perhaps. But overall, I keep my mouth fucking shut. Except on this blog, but Bud Fans ain’t here so I feel OK expressing myself.

But if a Bud Light hater is here and you feel the need to make a Tik-Tok showing you destroying a can of Bud Light, stop. Just stop. Buy another brand of beer and move on. Let others drink their beer in peace.

Here is the simple truth. Bud Light will go on. Those protesting will probably buy it and drink it this year. The Transgender community will still be here. No matter how much you deny them or demean them. So live your life and let others live theirs. The liquid inside the can is the same.

..and now this…